Last night I dreamed that Newt Gingrich was prepping a run for President by calling for a constitutional ban on halachah law.

Dream-Gingrich warned the American people that there are millions of Americans who adhere to halachah – and they’ve already infiltrated the halls of Congress, the Cabinet, and the US Supreme Court. Some of these politicians have passed up political responsibilities because they were too busy with halachah obligations. Another performed an elaborate ritual to make a US embassy halachah-compliant!

And what does this halachah code include? Gingrich warned us not to be taken in by halachah apologists (halacha-pologists) who claim it’s compatible with democracy. Halachah is drawn from a text that commands the wholesale slaughter of entire non-believing civilizations. Halachah bars followers from drinking wine that has been touched by anyone that doesn’t adhere to halachah. Halachah specifies that only some of its mandates can be superseded by secular law. And halachah even includes “Noachide laws” regulating the behavior of non-Jews! As a sign of the graveness of the threat, Gingrich warned that the US Congress had already passed a resolution recognizing these “Noachide laws” – emboldening halachah-adherents to impose their way of life on the rest of us. And yet US judges appease halachists by arbitrating disputes under halachah law (more halach-apology!). Gingrich pleaded with peace-loving Jews to renounce halachah and any of their co-religionists that adhere to it.

Then I woke up and discovered Gingrich and the modern American Right he represents don’t want to ban halachah. They just want to ban sharia.